One more post

Well, I am leaving Mexico this Saturday. It will be a bitter sweet goodbye for many reasons. Some of the kids that I am close to don't want me to go. Jonathan informed me the other day (for the second or third time) that he would be fine if I packed him in my luggage and took him home. If I could take some of them home I would. But on one last note here are some things that I observed here at Casa Hogar that make me smile:
1. There are stairs... and I use that term losely. Ther are planks of wood heldup by bricks on other pieces of wood. THere are times when I am going up them when I think that if I fell then that would be it, I would break some serious bones.
2. If a building inspector from the States came and saw some of the scafolding, stairs, and man made ladders they would have a heart attack right there on the spot.
3. Some of the boys have so much gel in their hair that they might qualify as flamable.
4. Paint here is a loose term. I had to make it (yes make it) and I was told not to breath in any of the things I was mixing together. And when I washed the paint off of the brushes it ate away some of the skin on my hands. Nice.
5. It rained last night and the interns sleep on the bottome floor. I could here beds moving around last night before I went to sleep. Translation: the roof is leaking and beds are being rearanged.

Those are some quirky things that I love about this place. It can be hard sometimes but the hardest part is always leaving. To say goodbye to faces that I don't know if I will see agaain that I have loved, gotten to know, laughed with, joked with, hugged, smiled, and loved on for so many years but especially last summer and this summer. I know I will miss them.
But there will always be a piece of my heart that is here, in Mexico, at Casa Hogar. I love this place and these kids. As I end this part of my journey I move onto another one. For anyone who has read my blog, thank you for reading and sharing in my experiences, joys, pains, and adventures here.

one more week

i keep thinking of things to write and then when i get to it i have forgotten... i think my memory is going too. haha. well, as of this saturday i am here for one more week. my month stay will be up and i will be headed back home. its crazy how fast it went. i couldnt tell you if my spanish it better or worse but the kids seem to think i speak it better than i actually do... which i find quite funny. they will ask me to translate or just say something and be on their way. its still frustrating but oh well.
after so many years of coming here and especially after last summer, i love that you can start to know personalities, likes and dislikes, strengths,weaknesses, tht kind of stuff. kevin (6yrs) likes to be held sometimes. he just does. he came up to me yesterday and gave my leg a bear hug. so i picked him up and he let me hold him for no reason and kept giving me giant huggs. :)kevin was the little one that was here last summer that didnt talk at all. nothing. this summer he is talking is i can see a difference in him. he sat in my lap as we sang with the team and i traced his finger along the words of the song. every once and a while he would look up at me and just smile he goofy, big eared, cute smile. as crazy and frustrating as the kids can be sometimes i love those sweet moments.

a search party for a missing car

so last friday i found lizandro (6 yrs) sobbing... i mean, something could have died. he couldnt even tell me what happend, he was so upset. so i asked his brother, gaudencio (7yrs), and he told me that lizandro lost a new toy car, that he had gotten in the last 30 minutes. so a search party started... me, guadencio, and osvaldo (13)were all searching for a toy car... in the dark no less. lizandro was just walking aimlessly and crying. so, i take him by the hand and we go looking int he dark for a small blue and yellow car. well, we can´t find the car and lizandro is heart broken. but i saw that one of the other boys had a pack of three cars. i ask him if i could see the pack and he said yes. i then asked lizandro if he liked any of the cars and his face lit up when he pionted to a spiderman one. so i asked the other boy if lizandro could have one of his three cars. yes, he said. i am thinking, wait... what? i don´t have to ask him twice or beg or explain that lizandro wants a car?! nope. he just said yes and i asked agian just to make sure and he gave the same answer. no questions or arguments or posessiveness. it always amazes me when these kids just share everything without hesitation. now, that doesn´t happen all the time... but more than it would bac k home. i love it. they are a family and although they have little they are able to enjoy it and let others enjoy it. anytime they have food or anything they offer it to me.
so jumping forward a few days... sunday the sermon was about family and what a christian family should look like and stuff like that. i was sitting there wondering what the casa hogar kids are thinking. most of them are not orphans. they have family that abandoned them, or couldn´t or woun´t take care of them. how do you grow up knowing that your family didnt want to take care of you or did want to but just wasn´t able to? some of the go back to visit family. i know they are used to it, in some sense, but i can´t imagine how it feels to go back and ¨visit¨your familly and go back to an orphanage. despite all of that these kids are so resilient and just great kids. i would take some home with me if i could.
thats about it... its really hot this week. i am hoping my toe will hold out until i get home.

differencesº

so tuesday i got gaudencio again and again he was crying. poor kid. but he was content to sit in my lap and cry there and eventually fell asleep. i had to wake him up for dinner but i wish he could have sat there forever. i cherrish the moments when i can hold the younger ones becuase they dont want to be held most of the time.
there are so many differences between this culture and ours and i love some of the differences. i love how relational this culture is. we were riding back from the beach last sunday and lalo was saving me a seat. so, i was sitting in the back with the boys between lalo and omar and just observing. there is a lot more affection allowed in this culture without the comments that would come from our culture. i watched as osiel (who was standing and having a punching match with omar) would ,without thinking about it, just rest his hand on robertos arm. or the boys are sitting crammed into the back of the bus, almost ontop of each other. in america we have such a sense of personal space... here it is different. but in a sense it has to be becuase these kids grow up with a family of 50. all that to say, every time i come i love the affection and the realtional part of this culture so much.

it¨s raining!

it has rained for the past two days and it has been wonderful! i never thought i would utter the words cold and mexico in the same sentence ever... but i was actually cold yesterday even though it was a brief period of time. what makes me laugh the most is the kids. they are used to the warm weather and so when it rains they come out with their pants and sweaters and all bundled up like its snowing. that is what cracks me up the most.
orangewood is here this week and so i get to spend a week with my mom and brother. they have been moving a lot of dirt but i think i see cement in the near future.
well, i cant think of anything else that has happened. i think i have another ingrown toe nail... so hopefully i can make it back home and have it taken care of there. and my heal still hurts (from where i had stitches)and my bad back hurts when i am doing any kind of shoveling. so... as i am falling apart at 20 (as my mom says) please pray that my body will hold out a few more weeks. :)

they want to be loved

there are many children here at casa hogar and the littlest ones are the easiest to love. they just are. some of the 10-12 year olds that are more energetic and have fun and loud personalities are also easy to love because you see them all the time. there are some kids that dont get recognized though. most of those kids are the older crowd of boys, ages 12 and up. for whatever reason i just connected with some of those boys last summer. jorge calixto (13), jorge(14), jonathan(14), roberto(14), lalo(13), and omar(15)- they are great and unique and i love hanging out with them. a lot of times they will just come and sit by me and we don´t have to say anything... we can just sit there. we can have a conversatoin or not... they will just sit there. they need attentiona and recognition. yesterday lalo came out and showed me his sketch book... he is amazing! he smiled as i looked through it and asked questions and things like that. he wanted to be recognized. later my jorge (calixto) asked me to help him with his homework... of all things... math. (not my strong subject to say the least). but i helped him and then he explained to me things about his grade point average and how he needs certain grades for this and that. the kid is so smart and i told him so. he wanted recognition. that same day roberto gave me a paper to look at. i was confused but opened it and it had a 10 written on at the top! as i complemented him he just smiled. he wanted to show me his grades and be recognized. i love these kids and they need people to love on them and praise them for their accomplishments. as hard as it is to be here sometimes those are the moments i love... the ones that make the kids feel special, unique, and appreciated.

This week so far

I had construction duty one day this week and most of the American teams struggle with two things. 1. They want to do cement- not moving tiles. Which I might add... those tiles have been moved a thousand times in the past 4 years. I know because Orangewood moved them at least three times a couple years ago. So, the team wants something more significant to do. Well, let me tell you, they don't know it but making and moving cement in Mexico is not that exciting, fun, and definitely not easy. 2. Americans want to give 120% the first day. They are running the tiles to the finish point. They have four more days or construction... take your time and don't kill yourself (is what I want to say). Americans want to be quick and efficient. Well, in Mexico, quick and efficient are not on top of the priority list. It will get done eventually and thats ok. The whole building isn't going to be up by the end of the summer. Moving on...
The kids.
Kevin (6 yrs) is a little boy that said absolutely nothing last year. Not a word. This year he is talking! Amazing. I was holding his hand as we were walking to craft the other day and he kept giving me kisses on my hand. :) He is a little softer around the edges this year too.
Gaudencio (7 yrs), bless his heart, had a rough day two days ago. Kevin decided to chuck a frisbee and poor Guadencio was staning about a foot away, in the line of fire. So, Guadencio gets hit and starts crying. I ran over and scooped him up and after he stopped crying he was happy to sit in my lap. Later I came up some stairs and he was crying again! And so I scooped him up and we just sat there and I held him. He likes to be held when he is hurt. Some of the younger ones don't.
I brought out sudoko again and Monse and I played. Then Uriel came up and saw what we were doing and made a comment. Uriel is 13 and he is an intelligent, quiet, independent boy. He is not one that really comes out and plays with the teams or hangs out with the inters. He has probably said a handful of words to me ever and he sat down and we started playing sudoku! Then Jorge Calixto came and went and it was still Uriel and I. So, when it was time to go to be I let him borrow the book. It is funny how something in common can bring two people together.
Well, today is my day off. So, I am resting and then it's back to work tomorrow.

I am here

i arrived saturday with two other interns- beka and mandy. mandy has been here before for a year before. it was not the feeling of nervousness that i had last year coming. i didn´t have a fear of getting lost or not being able to speak any spanish. and myrtille (she does everything and is in charge of the interns), in her infanite wisdomm said that the interns did not have to do the walmart bus trip. every year the interns are dropped off at walmart and told to get back to casa hogar.... not exciting... so that is two years in a row that i didn´t have to do that! there is no one here long term- so it is just the summer interns. it feels kind of weird because aaron was here last year and was in charge. but at least mandy and i have been here before so we know what to do.
i got to casa hogar and it was funny to see how the kids greeted me. jorge calixto and chucho gave me hugs and smiles. lupe and blanca sat there while i hugged them. dani looked at me quizzically and then said - i remember you! roberto got back to casa hogar late that evening and just came smiling and gave me a big hug. then in came lalo and his brother, omar.... probably two of my most favorite people ever! i was so glad to see them and they were glad to see me.
so Sunday we went to church and we crammed... and i mean crammed in the bus. i think we had 50-60 people in a bus that sat 20 comfortably. on the way it was... do i dare say a pleasant ride? i got to sand up right by the window and i got a great breeze until we stopped. gama was smart and sat on top of the chair beside me so he could ge t the wind too. on the way to and from the beach big jorge made sure he saved me a seat and so i had to sit down. so what is some more sweat added to everything else?
i spent a lot of yesterday just observing. one of the little ones, andres, kept coming to me with a piece of fabric with something in it. he would tell me it was icecream or something and then squeal with delight when i opened it and was so surprised that it was a fruit seed. i also brought the sudoku out and liz sat on my lap while monse and i played.
wednesday i have my day off. mrytille said i could come to her house and wash close and spend the day there. so, i will probably be able to write tomorrow night or wendesday.

and so i am starting again

Last summer I was able to live at Casa Hogar for two months and clean kness, wipe snotty noses, and love on children. This summer I am excited to be going back for a month. It is a long process of support raising, forms, and planning but it will be here quicker than I know it!
I have been to many countries and experienced many cultures but there is something about this tiny little orphange off of the main road in Acapulco, Mexico that I just can not explain. There is something that draws me there and makes me long to be there. There are precious faces that I love and adore and that love me back.
I was able to go to a children's home in Mississippi during my spring break and experience what an orphanage in the US was like. I was glad that I went but it just showed me how much I love Casa Hogar and the kids there. There is something about those kids, their stories, thier smiles, their personalities, that stick to me. I know some of their stories and despite the language barrier I could tell you their personalities, what they like, how they act around people. Do I know them completely? No. But I love them dearly and I don't think there is any place that will replace Casa Hogar in my heart.
I don't know how many more summers I will be able to do this but I will enjoy this one- the difficult days and the good ones.
The purpose of this blog is to let everyone back home know what I am doing and perhaps get a glimpse into my life there, the kids lives, and the culture of Casa Hogar.
So, this is for who ever to enjoy and comment on. But before you procede... know that I can not spell or put commas in the right spot! :]
Enjoy.